Today Mark worked and I felt like crap all day long.
Ernie jumped on one side of my recliner a knocked a empty cup of hot chocolate off along with a empty coke can. In that scuffle he jumped to the other side and knocked a whole can of Coke Zero to the floor. Being that I can hardly move I had a very hard time trying to clean it up because I can't breathe when I bend over. I did the best I could then I was exhausted.
Mark brought double meat and cheese Whataburger's home with fries and I finished the burger and most of the fries. Needless to say I wasn't "mindful" at all. Mark went about his day and I did my normal snoozing the day away.
I had a phone session yesterday with Kathy and it wasn't good. She doesn't get it. She has no idea what it is like to weigh over 420 and can't do very much in taking care of yourself. I'm sick of the badgering about eating out versus cooking. Today I have pondered quitting. I had it out with Mark tonight and I end the day feeling like no one understands my life. I don't know what to do. I know I want to be mindful but I want everyone off my back and give me some help. I just need help till I can function again. That is what I need and want right now. I'm tired. I also wasn't very mindful tonight.
It will get better. It has to! Prayers please!
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