I am leaving today around 3:00 p.m. I am scared to death!!!! This is such a huge step for me to take but Anna, Kathy, my husband and the friend that I'm riding with all want me to go and think that I need it. I didn't sleep last night. I have all my hygiene items packed and pray that they all do what I need!!!! I have all my stitching gadgets and power cords packed. I'm fixing to leave to go and get my hair colored and done and then get back to pack the rest of my stuff. I could just throw-up!
I will tell you one thing, I am going to beat this illness, I am. Yesterday Kathy thinks that with all the emotions that are going on inside of me and not wanting to eat that I'm fixing to hit rock bottom. I feel like I am already there. My feelings inside of me don't have words to describe. I told her yesterday that I have had thoughts of becoming a anorexic and she told me that was o.k. it was still the same disease, same emotions just different response and she could handle it. I just want to unzip my fat body and step out! I'm suffocating inside!!!!
Pray for me!!!! Pray that I can eat more today! Kathy and Anna are real upset with me but I just can't eat. The thought of it makes me sick!
I'll write when I get back home. Love you all!
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